Stay Away From the Kids, Roger
Surprise, surprise. After the revelations in the Mitchell Report that Roger Clemens did steroids, Texas high school baseball coaches may decide to cancel the Rocket’s appearance and speech at their state convention. The best part? The planned title of his speech:
Clemens, a seven-time Cy Young Award winner, has agreed to speak at the convention Jan. 12. The title of his speech, according to the organization’s Web site, is “My Vigorous Workout, How I Played So Long.”
Presumably this speech would have included exhibits like: Winstrol — How to Get It From the Shady Dealer at Gold’s Gym, What to Do When the Sight of a Needle Makes You Squirm (Get Your Buttbuddy to Inject You) and How to Ruin a HoF Career in Three Simple Steps.
From now on anytime you hear about a player’s “fanatical workout regimen” little syringe-shaped bells should be going off in your head.
Dude, did you SEE that SC piece on Clemens’ regimen? He has his trainer, like, throw him a football a bunch of times and stuff. That’s some intense shit!
[…] the same people who brought you My Vigorous Workout, How I Played So Long by Roger Clemens comes a series of speeches from other major leaguers. Including, but not limited […]